She left the room and I went back to reading the paper. A couple of days later and my recovery was coming along well - although I still had a broken leg to all intents and purposes - I had a metal plate and screws in the leg after the surgery and was wearing a sports brace. I couldn't stand on the leg but it was to pretty much immobelised and I was getting about on crutches. It was about half an hour after dinner and I was in bed without the sports brace when in walked an auxiliary to take my tray accompanied by Julie, the nurse from a couple of days back. The auxiliary left and Julie followed her to the door, closed it and turned to me with a big smile, saying that she had assisted in the theatre when I had my op. It was customary to fit male patients with a tube and bag for urine but that when she tried this while I was under anaesthetic she found that my urethra is too narrow. I was a bit taken aback at this, not by the facts but by her openness . She went on to tell me that. It would be easier if nothing had happened between us. That way I could leave in the morning and we could treat each other as we always had. Instead I let myself slip into doing something reckless. I hadn’t spoken any words, but I felt like I had made Nate promises with my body that I couldn’t keep. I don’t know how long I lay there without moving, how many minutes became hours. I strained to hear him move in the bedroom above me, but the blizzard outside suffocated every sound. I lay snug and warm in Nate’s flannel pyjamas, tucked beneath the blankets that smelled of him, but I’d never felt as lonely as I did lying here listening to the storm, knowing he was lying upstairs doing the same thing. If I was bold like Rhiannon or brave like Lilly I would have rushed upstairs to him instead of foolishly wishing he’d come downstairs to me. My cell phone rang, scaring me half out of my wits. It was a low tone, quiet enough that I wouldn’t have heard it if I’d been more than a foot or two.
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